Puerto Rico News Digest For April 1, 2017

REGGAETON TAX PROPOSED TO PAY DEBT

The head of Puerto Rico's internal revenue agency ("Hacienda"), Raúl Maldonado Gautier, proposed today the imposition of a tax on all reggaetón music purchases and public performances as a way to help the island's government boost its coffers in light of the billions of dollars in debt it faces. "Reggaetón is so prevalent in Puerto Rican society, and it generates so many millions of dollars, that I think taxing it as we do any other economic resource makes a lot of sense", said Gautier. "We estimate that we can cover at least a quarter of our approximately $70 billion in debt just by charging a small tax on every twerk performed in a typical reggaetón video." Fans of the genre, a combination of reggae, rap and latin rhythms, balked at the suggestion of the tax, and were considering staging a protest march in San Juan featuring souped-up Japanese cars, women dancing in thongs and a parade float featuring a giant blunt.

TRUMP PROPOSES BUILDING WALL AROUND PR

US President Donald Trump made a controversial proposal during a recent interview on Fox News: building a wall around Puerto Rico. "Puerto Rico has huge debt, and people keep leaving there and coming into America. We need to stop that. We'll build a huge wall, a magnificent wall, around that island. Then they'll have to stay there and figure out their problems", said the President. When asked how he would pay for the wall, Trump responded, "I'm thinking a tax on tacos. That's what they eat down there, right? Or cigars. A tax on cigars". Trump was then distracted by a fly that was buzzing around the studio and promptly forgot all about the idea.

GOVERNOR ROSSELLO REVEALED TO BE A ROBOT

During a recent press conference at La Fortaleza, Governor Ricardo Rosselló was revealed to really be a sophisticated robot after the metallic faceplate containing his face fell off while answering a reporter's question. The absence of the plate revealed  several circuits and electronic parts inside the Governor's head, and his speech became halting and repetitive, eventually stopping altogether, as smoke came out of the robot's ears. The robot uttered the word "plan" several times before seemingly shutting down. When questioned by the press as to whether he was aware that Rosselló had been a machine all along, Senate President Thomas Rivera Schatz said, "I guess I had some suspicions. He's still better than the previous guy, though". When presented with the same question, Resident Commissioner Jenniffer Gonzalez simply responded, "Yeah, I knew".

UNION WITH CHINA PROPOSED FOR REFERENDUM

A recently formed political organization proposed a new status formula for June's referendum on Puerto Rico's political status: union with the People's Republic of China. The leader of the group "Sino-Boricua Alliance", Juan Sanchez, spoke to the press on Friday, and offered several reasons as to why they believe Puerto Rico becoming part of China makes sense: "Chinese people have been present in Puerto Rico for centuries. Plus, both peoples have a love of eating rice, and uhh, well, China is an emerging superpower and they have a lot of cash". Sanchez, who wore a traditional changshan tunic and Fu Manchu-style moustache during his remarks, added, "We're willing to do whatever it takes to convince China to accept us if the U.S. kicks us out. We can learn karate, wear those pointy straw hats, eat with chopsticks...Puerto Ricans are an adaptable people." Sanchez closed the press conference by performing several botched martial arts moves before falling on the ground holding his leg in pain.




April Fool's!

Puerto Rico News Digest For September 19, 2016

CONGRESS COULD MAKE PROGRESS ON ZIKA

From The San Juan Daily Star:

"A long impasse that has delayed money to combat Zika for months neared an
end Thursday as congressional aides said Republicans would relent and let Pla-
nned Parenthood affiliated clinics share in new funding to fi ght the virus. The
potential deal would ease the way for Congress to quit work until after the Nov.
8 election. Democrats welcomed the move, which would address their chief
complaint to a GOP plan intended to fight the virus..."

PR WAR VETERANS VISIT SOUTH KOREA

From Yonhap:

" South Korea has invited Puerto Rican soldiers who fought during the Korean
War (1950-53) to visit the country 66 years after hostilities ended, military offi-
cials said Monday. Sixteen Puerto Rican war veterans are scheduled to make a
six-day trip to South Korea from Tuesday to Sunday as part of the 131 veterans
and their families from the United States and Puerto Rico. This marks the first
time that the veterans from the Caribbean island will be visiting the country, the
Ministry of Patriots & Veterans Affairs said. While here, they will visit the truce
village of Panmunjom, the Joint Security Area (JSA), the Seoul National Ceme-
tery and historic palaces, the ministry said in a statement..."

LUGARO ENCOURAGES VOTER REGISTRATION ON FB

From Caribbean Business:

"n a Facebook video that she appeared to have recorded in her residence, indep-
endent gubernatorial candidate Alexandra Lúgaro urged people to register to vote
before the deadline Monday, Sept. 19. In her Sunday evening video, Lúgaro em-
phasizes the importance of voting with, among other examples, speaking about
the massive electoral campaigns that focus on voting as a priority in some coun-
tries...In her message, which she also recorded in sign language, Lúgaro urged
voters to record a video or post anything, “even art,” that expresses the importa-
nce of voting, adding she would share these and that some 300,000 people would
be seeing them..."

MESON SANDWICHES TO EXPAND IN CENTRAL FL

From News Is My Business:

"Mesón Sandwiches, a Puerto Rico-based fast casual restaurant that marries
the flavors of the Caribbean with an American staple, will open this week its
third Central Florida location at the Premium Outlets Vineland in Orlando. Two
other Mesón restaurants are scheduled to open next year in Lee Vista Promenade
and the Gardens on Millennia, also in the Metro Orlando area, for a total of five
locations by the fall of 2017..."

Puerto Rico News Digest For March 28, 2016

MAN MURDERED IN DORADO OVERNIGHT

A murder was reported this morning at about 2:23 AM on Road PR-165 in

Dorado. Police found a bullet-riddled body inside a white 2001 Mitsubishi 

Mirage at kilometer 22.6. The man is yet to be identified, but is white with 

black hair and was wearing a black shirt and pants when he was killed. PR-

165 was shut down during an investigation, but was reopened to traffic by 

6:30 AM.

SEC CERTIFIES ALEXANDRA LUGARO

From The San Juan Daily Star:

"Independent gubernatorial candidate Alexandra Lúgaro was officially certi-
fied by the State Election Commission (SEC), SEC Secretary Walter Vélez
announced Wednesday morning. “The Endorsements and Petitions Valida-
tions Unit has finished evaluating all of the requests and the candidates have
been duly certified,” Vélez said in an interview with Wapa Radio. Vélez said
Lúgaro picked up her certification Tuesday afternoon at SEC headquarters in
the Hato Rey sector of San Juan..."

NPP CANDIDATES DISAGREE ON FINANCIAL BOARD

From Caribbean Business:

"The president of the New Progressive Party (NPP), Pedro Pierluisi, welco-
med Gov. Alejandro García Padilla’s announcement that he will convene a
meeting with the island’s candidates for governor to unite in rejecting the Re-
publican-proposed financial oversight board...The other gubernatorial hope-
ful from the NPP, Ricardo Rosselló, said Sunday that “the commonwealth’s
financial crisis is not solved calling for a united front” and reiterated he does
not want to create the false premise that he agrees with the governor’s position..."

TONY FINAU WINS PUERTO RICO OPEN

From ESPN:

"Tony Finau won the Puerto Rico Open on Sunday for his first PGA Tour
title, beating Steve Marino with a birdie on the third hole of a playoff at
windy Coco Beach. The 26-year-old Finau won with his third straight bir-
die in the playoff on the par-5 18th, blasting out of the back bunker to 3
feet. "I think I'm still a little bit overwhelmed," Finau said. "It probably
hasn't all sunk in." Marino was just off the back edge of the green in two,
but left his putt from the fringe 4 1/2 short and missed his birdie try to the
right..."

Gubernatorial Candidate Alexandra Lúgaro Sends Message To U.S. Government

Lugaro Counts On Social Networks For Support

Feature
Fox News Latino/EFE
Alfonso Rodriguez

The first independent candidate for governor of Puerto Rico, Alexandra
Lugaro, is counting on social networks to promote her image and create
a niche for herself in a system controlled for decades by two parties.

Lugaro, a 33-year-old attorney, told Efe in an interview Monday that
despite her campaign's lack of means to challenge the island's two hege-
monic parties, she firmly believes she can become the next governor of
Puerto Rico by making full use of social networks.

"Yes, I see myself as governor," Lugaro says about the balloting in
November 2016, a prospect she faces short of the financial wherewithal
traditionally needed to battle the ruling PPD, which promotes Puerto
Rico's status as a U.S. commonwealth, and the PNP, which wants the
island to...[CONTINUE READING]

Alexandra Lúgaro Unveils Plan for the Future

Feature

Latin Post

Latin Post presents "Turnout," a series that features leading 

Latino politicians, government leaders and advocacy groups 

discussing and debating the most important issues facing the 

Latino voting bloc. 

Alexandra Lugaro wants to change things in Puerto Rico and break 

free from the shackles of a dysfunctional two-party system that 

has brought the island to its knees. Lugaro, a 33-year-old attor-

ney and businesswoman, is running as the first independent for 

governor of Puerto Rico. The candidate's lack of party affilia-

tion places her outside the political circles, but she aims to 

inject new life, hopes, and ideas into the territory's government.

Born into a family that struggled economically, Lugaro credits 

education for her success, saying it offered her the tools to 

improve herself. She went on to earn a Bachelor's Degree in Busi-

ness Administration at the University of Puerto Rico and later a 

Juris Doctor at the same school...[CONTINUE READING]

Fox News Latino Interviews Alexandra Lúgaro

Feature

Fox News Latino

At just 33-years-old, Alexandra Lúgaro, a lawyer and business owner, is
causing a big stir in Puerto Rico – becoming the first person to run as
governor of the island as an Independent.

If elected, she would become the youngest to ever hold the island's highest
office and her ideas reflect her millennial sensibilities. She wants to legalize
marijuana, same-sex marriages, and tax the island's churches.

Lúgaro, a married mother to a 4-year-old daughter, believes it’s time for
Puerto Ricans to get away from the two-party system – where voters in the
commonwealth cast their ballots based on where the party stands on the issue
of Puerto Rican statehood --  instead of voting...[CONTINUE READING]

Puerto Rico News Digest For April 1, 2015

PUERTO RICO DECLARED INDEPENDENT BY CONGRESS

In an unexpected move that is sending shock waves through
both San Juan and Washington, the United States Congress
approved full independence for Puerto Rico in a vote late
last night. House bill HR 4115, the "Sovereignty for the
Puerto Rican People Act", sponsored by Illinois Congressman
Luis Gutierrez, passed by a vote of 320-199, with 10 members
abstaining or absent. The bill provides for the granting of
full sovereignty to Puerto Rico, which would then become
effective immediately once President Obama signs it into law.
The details of the transition are yet to be worked out, and
the sudden news is being met with consternation on the island.
Prices for Puerto Rico municipal bonds have dropped dramati-
cally in the markets this morning, as investors process the
unexpected development. Keep checking The Puerto Rico
Monitor for the latest updates on this story.

GOVERNOR GARCIA PADILLA RESIGNS

Puerto Rico Governor Alejandro Garcia Padilla is resigning his
post effective May 1st of this year. The one-term Popular Demo-
cratic Party Governor stated that "There ees, eeehhhh, nothink
mowr I can du too fix, este queeee, economee an stoff, so I go
now. Fock it". Secretary of state David Bernier will be sworn
in as Governor upon Padilla's resignation and will serve out
the remainder of his term. Padilla will reportedly open his
own language school upon leaving La Fortaleza, to be called
"Agapo's Engrish Languach Instituting".

ALEXANDRA LUGARO TO POSE FOR PLAYBOY

Independent gubernatorial candidate Alexandra Lúgaro announced
this morning at a press conference in San Juan that she has posed
for a nude spread for Playboy, which will appear in next month's
print issue of the men's magazine. "I think there's really no bad
way to promote my candidacy and the ideas behind it, and doing
this spread will definitely get some attention. It's not about the
sexuality, it's about pushing Puerto Rico forward. I also hope this
will help people forget about that FBI raid on my compa...I mean,
about  the dire economic situation." Some preliminary photos from
the Playboy shoot have been made available online here. When
reached for comment about the surprising announcement, aspiring
NPP nominee Ricky Rosello said "Well, I guess I'll have to pose
nude too."

NO VIOLENT CRIMES REPORTED OVERNIGHT

No one was shot, stabbed, raped, robbed, run over by a car,
set on fire or poisoned anywhere across Puerto Rico last night.
Police Superintendent Jose Caldero commented, "I don't know
what's going on, but I'm scared too."





April Fool's!

Puerto Rico News Digest For March 18, 2015

PR GETS 1ST INDEPENDENT GOVERNOR CANDIDATE

Lawyer and businesswoman Alexandra Lúgaro, age 33, has declared
her intention to run for Governor of Puerto Rico in 2016 as an inde-
pendent candidate. This makes her the island's first ever gubernatorial
contender who does not belong to or publicly identify with any political
party. Lúgaro is in favor of gay marriage, abortion rights and marijuana
legalization, and has also expressed a desire to tackle issues such as
income inequality. Lúgaro is currently finishing a doctorate in Madrid
and is the founder of a student tutoring company in Puerto Rico.

LAURENS HIGLER'S FRIENDS' TOUCHING LETTER

The travelling companions of deceased Dutch globetrotter Laurens 

Higler, who was killed last week in a hit and run accident,  wrote a 

moving letter to the people of Puerto Rico regarding the recent 

tragic events:

LEGAL ISSUES SEEN WITH IVA RECEIPTS

From The San Juan Daily Star:

The Justice Department said Monday that Puerto Rico could
be held liable if merchants are banned from separating the
value added tax from the final price of items on receipts.
“The restriction against merchants separating the IVA [the
Spanish acronym for the value-added tax] from the final
price could be challenged in the courts because it interferes
with free speech rights,” Assistant Justice Secretary Rafael
Ortiz said. The proposed tax reform measure leaves it to the
Treasury secretary to decide whether the IVA should be dis-
played separately.

14 ARRESTED, 1.1 TONS OF COCAINE SEIZED

From Fox News Latino:

Agents of the United Rapid Action Forces, or FURA, of the
Puerto Rican police, seized 1.1 tons of cocaine and arrested
14 Dominicans, most of whom were waiting for the drug to
arrive from a boat off the northern coast of the Caribbean island,
officials said. Puerto Rican Police Chief Jose Caldero said
the boat had sailed to the estuary of Rio Grande de Loiza river
and that the drug had a street value of some $32 million.

PUERTO RICO UNEMPLOYMENT DOWN TO 12.4%

From Caribbean Business:

Puerto Rico Labor Secretary Vance Thomas announced that the
unemployment rate for January stood at 12.4%, representing the
lowest figure since 2008. "Data from the recent employment survey
show that the unemployment rate adjusted for January fell to 12.4%,
making it the lowest reported since August 2008, when it was 12.2%,"
Thomas said Tuesday. He added that the rate is 1.3% lower when
compared with December 2014 (13.7%) and 2.5% down from
January 2014 (14.9%).

UPR AGUADILLA PROVIDES TAX SERVICE

From News Is My Business:

The University of Puerto Rico in Aguadilla announced Tuesday
it will be offering free help to low and middle-class residents
to fill their federal income tax return, Saturdays from 9 a.m.
to 1 p.m. at the campus library through April 11. The UPR-Agua-
dilla Virtual Center for Assistance to Taxpayers (known in
Spanish as the VITA Center) is part of an alliance  with the
UPR-Mayagüez western region VITA Center.



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